The people have spoken

The true genius of the founders was that they established a Democratic Republic.  A system of governance in which when the people speak, the powerful must listen.  Well the people have spoken, my friends.  And I am not talking about the political primaries last night.  Boooooooooorrrrrring!

I am talking about America's new favorite sandwich, the KFC Double Down.  The sandwich was supposed to only be available until this coming Sunday.  But KFC has reported that sales have been so brisk, they will continue to make the sandwich available for as long as it remains profitable.

Those corporate fat cats at KFC thought they could introduce the sweet, sweet Double Down to the American public and then take it away like a thief in the night.  But we told those oligarchs.  When you offer us a sandwich comprised of two slabs of chicken in lieu of bread with bacon strips and cheese and sauce in the middle, you must continue to make it available indefinitely.  We are a proud people, and we deserve no less.

So remember, "Don't Just Feed Your Hunger--Crush It!"  Head in to KFC for a delicious Double Down.  The founders would be proud.

A proud moment

I know it's been a long while since I have blogged at ya.  But something has come to my attention that is of such grave importance that I couldn't allow it to go without comment.  What has happened?  Oh, it's really no big deal. American society has just reached the highest peak of awesomeness, that's all.  I am speaking, you might have already guessed, about the Double Down, a new sandwich from the chicken wizards at KFC.

The sandwich is, according to KFC nutrition scientists, "so meaty, there's no room for a bun."  I commend them on their efforts at including a bun.  I can only imagine how they toiled thanklessly in some dark basement laboratory trying to fit a bun around all that meat and cheese.  But in the end, you can't fight the inevitable.  And so, KFC was forced to release the Double Down sans bread.

The sandwich, which was released this past Monday, April 12th, is comprised of two pieces of fried chicken (presumably in lieu of bread), two slices of cheese, the Colonel's sauce, and bacon.  For the health conscious, you can get the chicken bread in both grilled and original recipe versions.

This just makes me want to start chanting U-S-A!  U-S-A!  This sends a message to those who would oppose American, from rogue nations, to international terrorists.  You know what that message is?  "We are a people of great resolve.  We invented the Double Down.  Clearly we have no fear of death.  Do you really want to test us?!"

By the way, this thing is still healthier than many other fast food items, believe it or not.  Now that's American ingenuity.